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Story of Love between Germany and S. Korea
Story of love between Germany and S. Korea

I am a German 35-year-old man from Berlin. I'm writing to you because I have (maybe) an interesting topic for your online news magazine.

The subject is about love between a German man and a Korean woman, and the fail of this love because of cultural differences. The differences of the idea of getting married were too big and caused problems.

Here is a short explanation of my story:

I met a woman from Seoul in 2004 in Sydney, Australia. We went to the same English school there. Both of us were interested in each other very much, but we couldn't get into a closer contact because the woman was to shy and our english was not good enough.

Nevertheless we kept contact by e-mail all over the recent years. In 2007 our e-mails became more intimate and we thought about visiting each other and maybe getting married if we still love each other. But at this time we couldn't manage to meet.

We tried to meet again in 2009, but again it failed, due to different reasons.

Suddenly, in spring 2010, the Korean woman decided to visit me, and finally it worked, she came to Berlin in May 2010. It happend, we falled in love each other.

When she went back to Seoul after two weeks, I told her I'll visit her in Korea in August 2010 and after this maybe she can come to Berlin by a working-holiday-visa. She is still 29 and working at a big hotel in Seoul as a receptionist.

But then, when she was back in Seoul, she told me a shocking secret: her family wants her to get married NOW. She is already quite old (Korean age is 30), and it's time to get married and have a family.

There was a Korean man from Seoul who wanted to get married with her, but she didn't love him. So she was crying when we were talking on the telephone and she always told me "Save me from this man, marry me."

I didn't know what to do, because everything came so sudden, and it seemed to be impossible to get married with a woman I know only for a few weeks. In Germany getting married is not so important any more, and we marry only after knowing each other for a long period of time.

What should I do? I was in love with this woman, but I had to decide quickly to marry her or not, otherwise another man will get her.

There was one more important thing: She said to me that she is afraid of living in Berlin, so far away from her family, maybe lonely, no income etc.

I thought there is only one possibility: Meet her again and talk with her about everything, getting to know her more, and maybe make a decision about the marryage.

So I decided to fly to Seoul much earlier. In fact, I went to Seoul on the 17th of June 2010, just two weeks after the woman had left Berlin.

My aim was to meet her, talk with her, and make a plan for the future.

But, when I arrived in Seoul, the family of the woman aranged a dinner together with me on the second day of my arrival. At that dinner, they pushed me to make a proposal, to ask the woman to become my wife.

I was too shocked that it was so fast, I just arrived, I couldn't talk to the woman about everything, and suddenly I had to make a speech in front of the full family. It was a terrible strange situation for me.

I tried to talk about my ideas of our future, but this was not the
stuff they were waiting for.They were waiting for a proposal. They thought I only went to Seoul to make this proposal.

The days after this dinner were strange, everything changed, and I felt quite bad. I wanted to fly home and booked an earlier flight.

Well, things aranged a bit, we talked with each other, but the woman didn't believed in my love anymore. She said, that I don't love her if I don't marry her. So we can be only friends.

I stayed in Seoul until the end of my trip, I didn't fly back home earlier. I couldn't talk with the woman anymore about serious things, I was still too shocked and didn't know what to do or what to say. The woman cried easily.

After coming back to Berlin I tried to keep contact with her, but she almost stopped contact and is writing only one email each two weeks.

Thomas Hollweck
thomas.hollweck@googlemail.com



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